Rachel (24) asks:

So I dated this guy for 2 years. We recently broke up about 2 months ago. It was more his doing in that he said he needed to get himself together, needed to figure out what he wanted in life, didn’t know how we could make each other happy, etc. Well it was rough at first and it took me sometime to be able to get through the day without being sad or missing him. I have since then went on a few (but unsuccessful dates) and have tried to enjoy myself more. Now all of a sudden my ex wants me back and he is trying hardcore to make it happen. He found out about the other guys (I did not tell him, he broke into my email) so now he’s telling me how hard it is and rough it is to hear about me with other men. He tells me he realizes what he has lost and he regrets letting me go. If he had said this a few months ago I would have jumped back in the relationship in a heartbeat but now, I don’t know what to do. I’m torn honestly. I still care about him but I’m not sure the damage can be healed. As unsuccessful as my dates may have been it’s still kind of fun getting to know someone new and getting that attention that you didn’t feel you had in your relationship. Don’t get me wrong, my ex isn’t a bad guy and I loved him very much but now I’m just so confused. Do I give us another chance? Do I see if things can really work out for us this second time around? Or do I just move on and forget him? Could really use the advice! PS. Loveeeee the column.

Bitter Betty says:

First of all, Thanks for reading the column, I am glad you like it…I’m pretty awesome…stoked you feel the same way!!!  Let’s get to business…I think I might have your problem solved…so here it goes…

A#1: I have to say that I am proud of you.  Good for you for jumping back into the game, even though your dates haven’t amounted to much, you are getting back into the swing of things.  This says a lot about you, and there is no better way to take your mind away from heartache like a free dinner and some harmless flirting.  You said it yourself, you are having fun getting to know other dudes and I think you should keep it up..dates are fun and you learn a lot about yourself.  Yay for that.

B#2:  Any guy that breaks into your private email account is an ass.  At no point in a relationship should your partner take it upon themselves to violate your privacy.  This makes your ex look desperate, crazy and stupid.  I can say so much about people like this…it angers me to know, that people feel they have the right to snoop.  Your business is YOUR business…and he nor any other man has the right to stick his nose in it.  Looks to me like homeboy got jealous after finding out what you have been doing with your time and to be honest, I don’t think he wants you back because he loves you, I think he wants you back because now he can’t have you.  Men and women are infamous for wanting someone slightly out of their reach and once we get it, we don’t want it anymore.  There very well might a chance that dude really might love you…but there is a larger chance that he is a douche. 

C#3: It sounds like you are kinda over it.  You will probably always have feelings for your ex and those feelings might never ever go away.  However, if you were 110% confident that getting back together with Douchie McDoucherton was the right choice, you wouldn’t be emailing me.  In fact, you wouldn’t need me at all, when it comes to swear-by-chocolate-true-love, you wouldn’t listen to what anyone had to say about it. If it’s meant to be, the fate fairies would make sure that you are together…except I don’t believe in fate fairies…so I guess you are just up creek and you are really gonna have to sit down and decide if a relationship with Mr. Email Hacker is someone you trust to spend the rest of your life with.

p.s. Change your password and your secret question to prevent  Mr. Loserface from ever taking a peek into your bizzness again.

Hope that helps!!!

Sincerely, Bitter Betty

Nancy (15) asks:

Ok well there’s this guy i like i dated him for about two years & we broke up but i still have feelings for him. were really close now still but it’s not the same as before. i’ve known him for a while now is there anyway i could make him see it was a loss for him?…

Bitter Betty Says:

Alright Princess..I’ve said this before and I have a feeling I am going to have to say it again and again and again.  Move along.  I get it, you like a boy who doesn’t like you back.  Now you want to make him realize how awesome you are so he comes crawling back and you two will live happily ever after.  I hate to burst your bubble, but if he thought you were that awesome, you would be together right now, instead of writing me for advice.  Every girl likes to make her ex believe that he has lost something great and I am sure that this poor boy doesn’t realize what he has lost. but come on girl…what are you waiting for? You are basically asking me what you can do to make your ex want you back.  Read that last sentence again and really think about how awful that sounds..relationships are NOT THIS COMPLICATED.  I can’t tell you how many times I say this a day.  You should NEVER work that hard…if you aren’t together, there is a reason.  If he does not want to be with you, dressing cute and flirting with his friends isn’t gonna win him over.  Girls, we are way too good to stoop this low.  Get over him, if it is meant to be…it will be, but don’t over analyze and stress over ways to get him back in a relationship.  It is exhausting and totally not worth it.  So put on those high heels and a smile…one day there is going to be a boy that already knows how awesome you are, and you’ll realize that what you are doing now is stupid. 

Hope that helps!!!

Sincerly,

Bitter Betty

Tori Asks:

What does it mean when a boy tells his cousin that he likes you but he igores you most of the time?

Bitter Betty says:

This is easy, I am sure that the boy you are referring to is the same age as you, and if this is true, I think the boy is shy.  Teenage boys are awkward and weird and they haven’t quite mastered the art of flirting or even dating for that matter.  Teenage boys are nervous and chances are he is intimidated and doesn’t know what to say.  If you aren’t a weenie, go and talk to him yourself, you might be surprised.

Ashley asks:

OK, I have been “crazy” about this one guy for years now. We dated breifly in College and we recently found each other on Facebook and started going out. For some idiot reason I have built him up into this great guy that is definitly the best man in the world for me, even though I do not know him that well. I mean, really know him. I think to know someone you need to see them at their worst, their best, when they are happy, when they are sad, etc. I know he is not going to commit to me, and part of me feels like I should just move on and try to forget about him. But I like him so much I will almost take any time I can get with him. I KNOW how pathetic that is, but it is how I feel. I feel like the main reason I like him so much is simply because he is unattainable. I am pretty certain of that. So how do I either just go out with him and just have fun without any expectaions for the future???? Or should I just let him go???? I can not seem to stop thinking about him and I REALLY want to stop thinking about him ! HELP!!!!!!!

Bitter Betty says:

You said it yourself…your behavior is pathetic..and it is.  I hate to be harsh, but you and every other freaking girl in the world has been in this same situation.  Girl likes boy.  Boy doesn’t want to settle down.  Girl gets heartbroken.  This is the same sad story…my advice goes like this:  Your boy knows what he wants and he sure as hell knows who he wants to marry and I doubt that girl is you.  If a guy wants to be with you, he will.  If he wants to marry you, he will.  Move on.  This is situation is pretty cut and dry…if he ain’t in it to win it, there is no point in waiting around to see if he just might, maybe come around and realize he is madly in love with you.  From the sound of it, you are a smart girl, now act like it and move on. 

Crystal’s Question: Is there really such a thing called true love?  If so, then why do so many people get hurt so easily?

Bitter Betty’s Answer:

Of course there is such a thing as true love.  I have true love for Oreo milkshakes, designer handbags, and those cute little Donut holes you get from Dunkin Donuts.  I am almost positive that true love exists…have I found it?  Hell-to-the-no, and from the sound of it, neither have you.  All I know is that true love is there, and it is real. You have a soulmate and so do I…however I am pretty sure mine got hit by a bus crossing College St. 

To answer the second part of your question….people get hurt because they are stupid. Yep Stupid.  Guys and girls alike act like complete idiots when it comes to relationships. Those butterflies we get we think we are in love with someone cause us to behave like fools, we become irrational, impulsive and jealous.  Many times we lose ourselves on the search for Mr. or Mrs. Right, our  morals and judgement becomes clouded and instead of ending a relationship early enough to prevent heartache, we drag them on forever for fear of being alone.  My advice to you Crystal: Suck it up, you are still a baby, and you’ve got plenty of time to find your true love.  In the meantime, enjoy yourself, make bad decisions, and live a little.  No sense in waiting around, the more you search for your soulmate, the more you look like a desperate old maid.  Life is way too short to be on a constant hunt for Mr. Right, and in my opinion, it is certainly a lot more fun to let Mr. Right find you.

                                                                 Sincerly,

                                                                        Bitter Betty